And So it Begins

Yesterday, and the weeks preceding it, revealed the struggle(s) that I will be facing for arguably the rest of my life. Almost five hours spent at Nalley Toyota of Roswell bargaining, negotiating, stipulating, and questioning the various sales team members exposed the indecisiveness of my soon to be mother-in-law. At first, I must admit, when the Ostrich was so quick to temper at the outset of her mom’s differing opinion I felt it a little uncalled for. I understand that she had been dealing with this woman for twenty odd years of her life but I thought patience was simply the lacking element. Yesterday proved me ignorant and wrong to that fact!

Allow me to explain. The Ostrich had been looking to upgrade her car to a more technologically advanced and environmentally friendly one for investment reasons and for peace of mind. Her previous 98’ Accord was a source of repeated stress as the service light was interminably warning of some new complication. This car, over the two or three years that she owned it, demanded more money in repairs than she had paid for it in the first place; and those repairs were only going to grow in frequency as the miles added up, a complication explained by her mechanic uncle that affected all Hondas over 100,000. Why waste the money when she could invest in a new car that would relieve this eternal stressor using the current value of the car that was only going to depreciate the longer she drove it?

The decision was made, or so we thought, to search for a new car. As I mentioned above, the weeks that preceded yesterday were spent perusing autotrader.com in search of the ideal car. Toyota Yaris? “No, too small and unsafe,” said her uncle. What about a slightly used Honda Civic? We looked at two reasonably priced ones only to find the Hispanic sales staff to no more want our business than we wanted to give it to them. Not to mention both of the civics were complete pieces. And on this day I was introduced to the art of car sales and negotiations. I matured my abilities and understanding from that experience and personally vowed to never step foot in that hole-in-the-wall of a dealership again.

By this time, we had relied on her uncle a little too much and he was beginning to feel the strain of a continuous search without end. If it was either of our choice and not my mother-in-law’s we would have been done with the matter. But alas, it took a dwindling deadline of a week and the sale of the Ostrich’s accord to really establish that the search was a legitimate pursuit and not just a fanciful hope for something shiny and new.

The Ostrich had been offered an opportunity in Indiana for incredible sales experience, completely due to her energetic and optimistic personality! Heck, that’s why I fell in love with the woman. However, this opportunity required her to have a reliable form of transportation and preferably one that would save her money from the rising gas prices. My mother-in-law offered the Ostrich her car to drive around in Indiana stating that she would look for a new car. It took little time for us to realize that this offer was no more than an attempt to get rid of the stagnant and now boring so that my mother-in-law could have something new.

The thought of saving money on gas narrowed our search down to the somewhat affordable Toyota Prius. The Ostrich instantly fell in love with the idea and we turned our attention on to this car alone. After a fair bit of searching and with the stress building to climax as her mom searched at home we wagered to go look at a set of Priuses at Toyota Mall of Georgia. My mother-in-law was too suspicious of private sellers, regardless of the lower price tag and she was right to be so. However, she had enveloped herself so far into the idea of the dealership sale that she was willing to go beyond our budget for something that was no better than a deal from a competing dealer.

The budget itself was a source of wavering stress as the amount vacillated between a formidable and generous amount from my soon to be stepfather-in-law’s life savings to “we aren’t getting you a new car;” to an even higher amount with the Ostrich’s grandmother loaning her help, back again to you aren’t getting a car; then up to an even higher amount with a little added capital from my mother-in-law herself, to a finally over-increased beyond budget amount that depended upon the purchase of a new car that was slightly more than that of the tag for a used Prius.

The variability in her decision revealed the inheritable source of the Ostrich’s often frustrating indecisiveness. I am lucky, however, to have the better of the two levels of indecision. My mother-in-law, as I said before, was absolutely frustrating in making up her mind but I digress.

So, after viewing one of the two cars at Toyota Mall of Georgia—the other was said to be in their inventory but was lost somewhere on the lot—and being offered a newer, lower mileage Prius for a price higher than our budget, we decided to leave. I felt a little defeated by my mother-in-law’s seemingly unconcerned attitude. Time clearly was not weighing on her mind, as I wondered if it did in any of her decisions.

What we did accomplish at the dealership was setting up our target vehicle, that is the frame of car characteristics that we wanted: had to have power seats (I honestly didn’t know how much power seats meant to a woman until I saw it explained and demonstrated by my mother-in-law); mileage below 50,000; some kind of warranty;at or below $15,000; full option - navigation, rear view camera, etc.; and obviously had to come from a dealership.

Pushing the defeat aside, the next morning I researched our database of available cars and found a match! All that I needed to do was man-up and call to negotiate the price. I called Courtney, an internet sales team member at Nalley Toyota of Roswell, and was able to lower the price from $15,995 without taxes, certification of warranty, and other fees down to $15,000 flat, or so I thought. I scheduled an appointment between 5:00 and 6:00 that night and was promised that the price would be honored for just that day by either Brooks or Josh.

The Prius was a gold 07’ Toyota with 48,000 miles, and was full package complete with: navigation, rear view camera, power-almost-everything, a dvd entertainment system that hung from the ceiling. Among other things the car was clean and had a clean carfax report. I had done it! I found the car that met our sampling frame and at the price that we were looking to spend. So, of course everyone was going to be exited right? Wrong!

The Ostrich called her mom and told her of my recent find and the negotiated price and my mother-in-law said that she didnt want to buy it. I thought, “WHAT!?! Why the heck wouldn’t we buy it? It fits everything that you and she wanted down to the leather interior!!!” Apparently, she had changed her mind AGAIN about wanting to buy a new car and was concerned that this was not a reputable dealership. I quickly rebutted that it was THE Toyota dealership of Roswell. It couldn’t be more reputable. Her mom still said that she wanted to come look at the Priuses in Athens, all of which we knew were higher prices and had less or no options than the Prius that I had just negotiated for. Why would we even waste our time looking at cars that we knew she would refuse to buy, let alone that were a worse deal than the one that we had sitting right in our lap?

The Ostrich was frustrated at this point, as was I, but I affirmed that we would just have to drive my mother-in-law over to the dealership and be done with it. No more wasting time searching for a car only to lose the best deal that was available in this one. It had everything that she was looking for in our target car for goodness sake! The irrationality of my mother-in-law was mind-boggling to me, but again I could see where the Ostrich gets her oft irrational perspective.

Her mom decided to come pick us up after class and head to the dealership in Roswell after all. While in the car, my mother-in-law was still trying to sell the Ostrich on the idea of buying a new Toyota Corolla for $17,000-$18,000 ($2000-$3,000 over budget) because SHE thought it looked better and enjoyed the peace of mind of having a new “worry-free” warrantied car as she put it. This is the time that we realized that my mother-in-law was envious of the Ostrich getting a new car and in fact wanted to have her buy the Corolla that she wanted. It made no sense and my stepfather-in-law thought so too. “Let her buy the car that she wants because it is HER car,” he said to my mother-in-law.

It seemed as if every new-looking car we passed on the road my mother-in-law would question, “why not buy that new car?” The Ostrich was already set on the Prius and I had advised her not to settle for anything less than what she wanted, especially considering that this car would have to last her for the next five years. So she resolutely denied any other car that her mom brought up asserting that, “we are going to go buy the car that I want right now and I don’t want any other!”

I must admit, I was getting a little weary of this constant change in my mother-in-law’s decision. I couldn’t understand why she wouldn’t just allow the Ostrich to get the car that we all decided and agreed was the perfect car? It seemed like she wanted to fight every step of the way, and she did. Believe me she did!

We arrived at the dealership with our minds made up, save for my mother-in-law who was determined to live or drive vicariously through her daughter. We inspected the gold Prius, test drove it, found it to be in excellent condition and then sat down to talk about the paperwork. By some misunderstanding, the $15,000 flat that I was agreed on the phone was the price of the car itself minus the extra taxes and fees so the final price came out to $16,599.

I argued back and forth with the used sales management but to no avail. Courtney had apparently sent an email to the boss dictating that she informed me of the price discrepancy and that the fault was on me alone. If anyone knows me, I hate being accused of being wrong when I know that I am not. I elaborated the conversation that I participated in and repeated that I wanted the $15,000 to be the all-inclusive drive-off price. I told Courtney that I had a budget of $15,000 and she returned after talking to the manager to inform me that “He said we can do $15,000 flat.” Apparently, she did not clarify that by saying “we can do $15,000 flat,” she meant “we can do $15,000 not including all other fees,” which was clearly beyond my budget.

So here we stood, two hours out from Athens, with a decision to make on a price that was above what was agreed upon. I did not want to cause any trouble with management seeing as the mistake was a misunderstanding and the sales team was not going to budge. I did, however, manage to get them to drop the price to $16,000 flat (this time all-inclusive) without the 7 year/100,000 mile warranty, which only extended the current warranty another 2 years.

The price was still too high for my mother-in-law, regardless of the fact that she was willing to spend $2,000 more on a car that the Ostrich didn’t even want. She argued, quite embarrassingly, about different haggled prices and tried to give the sales team an ultimatum that the Ostrich and I knew was already decided. She said $15,000 flat and told them to decide or we were to leave, and leave we did. I couldn’t believe it. Time was running incredibly short and this was undoubtedly the best deal that we were going to be able to find.

$16,000 for a 07’ Prius with a warranty, 48,000 miles, full package with some extras, and I failed to mention that it was a touring model so it had even more extras (fog lights, etc.). We weren’t going to be able to find anything better, let alone in the next couple of days when both the Ostrich and I had to be studying for finals. I hated to see us lose the deal but we left, again defeated and again her mom seemed unconcerned. “We will just buy a Corolla, Prius is too much,” she said as we headed for dinner.

I wasn’t, however, done with the sale and the Ostrich and I decided not to give up. She did the convincing and I called the sales team back asking if the offer still stood. He appreciated the phone call and said that he would honor it. The Ostrich finally got her mom to agree after calling her uncle for the millionth time who told her to “buy it already!” He was surprised that we were still there and was frustrated with how the Ostrich’s mom was handling the situation.

So we returned to the sales room and were welcomed back. The Ostrich’s pride was a little hurt from the embarrassing show before but I was determined to close the sale. We waited as the paperwork was drawn up and were surprised again as my mother-in-law apparently did not understand why we didn’t get the warranty anymore. “We dropped it to lower the price,” we said but she seemed not to like that, almost deciding to get up right there; but we assured her that there was still the manufacturer’s warranty on the car. She was suspicious and wanted a piece of paper saying that the warranty was there and we were told that it was conveniently placed in the owner’s manual. She was not convinced. I was told that it was an Asian thing to have a piece of paper that you can “shove in someone’s face to say ‘here is my warranty’.”

After the sales member agreed to print out a copy certification he took the paperwork to the business manager to setup the financial step in the process. We waited for a good 15 minutes before he returned and then followed him to meet Eugene, the business manager for Nalley. He was a tall dark-haired Russian man. To my surprise, my mother-in-law greeted him in Russian and they had a short conversation over the beauties and delights of Russian culture. After this short but pleasant reprieve we got into the numbers. Here again, she fought with the sales team arguing over percentage points and almost refusing the deal once more. It was like handling a delicate time-bomb and the only way to deactivate it to get what you wanted was to be patient and not try anything too hasty.

I explained every financial step to her as I was understanding it, seeing as I was just learning the intricacies of free loan agreements in the very meeting. I calculated the total expenses, despite the manager’s disagreement over total cost, and explained the variable rates if the loan was paid off before the loan period ended. It was informative for me but I couldn’t help but notice the pitches that the manager was trying to push with each new proposition: the extended warranty, the premium package, etc. We debated the numbers and the down payment amounts and all the while wasting a fair bit of this man’s precious time in deliberation. We were reasonably asked to agree upon a decision outside as he had other customers that were ready to sign a contract and the Ostrich and I were more than happy to oblige as I discovered that my mother-in-law was more than thorough in her purchasing details.

It was nearing obnoxiousness how indecisive my mother-in-law was and after a fair bit of conversing and one last call to the Ostrich’s uncle, we decided to decline the extended service warranty and take the car as-is for $16,000 flat. However, in signing the innumerable signature lines she came upon the certification topic again and we were told to talk to the used sales team about that. She stopped signing and we left the room to conclude the certification matter as she was unsatisfied with any possible complications. We stepped back into the used sales office and I could tell that everyone on the team was thinking, “Oh no not again! They haven’t left yet?” 

I stepped up and asked for my mother-in-law what their policy was on returns in case we brought the car home to the Ostrich’s uncle and her were to find anything wrong. They said that we had three days to inspect the car and if we found anything we could bring it back to exchange it for another car. However, they argued that the inspection was unnecessary because the car had already gone through the 160-point inspection required to certify the car, a fact that both the Ostrich and I knew already. My mother-in-law still didn’t understand, she wanted to see the paper and was still skeptical about the car.

“You don’t have to worry because you are buying a Toyota from a Toyota dealership,” they assured us with a tinge of frustration and mockery. She was still unconvinced and wanted the paperwork. They agreed to show us the paperwork documenting the inspection and all of the passing checks but informed us that we could not keep it because we declined the $599 certification inspection. My mother-in-law still wanted a copy but didn’t understand that she had to pay for it. They joked that we could give them $599.00 for the paper as that was the policy but reminded us that it was unnecessary as we all saw that it passed. She still wanted a copy and so they conceded to give us the invoice that showed that they paid for the certification inspection.

It was crazy. What don’t you understand? The car had to pass the inspection to be able to be sold as certified, which it did, so you don’t have to worry. Either way we had the original invoice and went back to Eugene to finish the paperwork. He reminded us of all of the figures and apparently my mother-in-law had forgotten the finance percentage that was agreed upon and AGAIN, almost walked out. We were SO close!!! 

After a little more lecturing on how denying the warranty meant that the Ostrich was accountable for all of the maintenance fees she completed the paperwork and we had purchased a new car. Almost five hours with the sales staff and twenty minutes after the lot closed we got both set of keys and hopped in the car. My mother-in-law was still talking to the sales team member when the Ostrich demanded that I get in the car to “leave these people alone.”

But that wasn’t the end of it, surprisingly enough! Despite being far away from the dealership with the peace of mind of deactivating the time-bomb, the next morning, today, we got a phone call from my mother-in-law saying that insurance was too expensive and that she was going to return the car. I was beyond frustrated at this point! Thankfully, she was mistaken and her insurance agent was able to get her a very reasonable price and I can only hope that the matter is over with.

This was just a taste of the indecision that I am going to have to face for the rest of my life. Am I ready for it? I don’t believe I will ever be! Will I suck it up and deal with it? Of course I will because I love the Ostrich and this crazed woman is going to be my mother-in-law. Oh the craziness!